tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4174475975998900252024-02-02T15:40:24.731-06:00Mountain MomentsBreathing the majesty, climbing the height, resting in the shadow, gaining the summit.
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08364772406101391283noreply@blogger.comBlogger30125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-417447597599890025.post-35864295511529414192015-08-26T14:59:00.000-05:002015-08-26T14:59:11.395-05:00Caaaarrrrs!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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Once again, I am sewing along at Project Run and Play. I have enjoyed the challenges so far. I like how they push me to grow
my sewing ability. This time the
challenge was to use hand stitching in some way. I chose embroidery. </div>
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My grandma taught me embroidery when I was a preteen, but I
haven’t done it since. I always assumed
it was too time consuming. This month I
discovered I was wrong. Yes, it takes
time, but it goes much quicker than I imagined. It is a lot of fun too!</div>
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My sister’s mother-in-law sent me some fabric that she had
sitting around from when her boys were small.
I loved the bright vintage cars on the black background and determined
to make something out of it for Enoch. At
two years old, he is currently obsessed with anything with wheels and a
motor. His favorite word is caaaaarrrr! He
uses this word to mean all vehicles from a motor scooter to a bulldozer. Enoch saw the fabric and fell in love. He played with it for a long time and would
hardly let me take it away. I knew we
had to use it soon. </div>
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I didn’t want to make clothing out of it for two
reasons. For the first, it’s quilting
cotton and I knew it wouldn’t hold up to little boy play very well. More importantly however, I wanted to make
something that he would keep for a long time, not a pair of shorts or a shirt
to be quickly outgrown. I have been
wanting to make him a backpack for a while so that’s what we went with.</div>
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I traced some of the vehicles from the fabric with a pen on
to a scrap of cream fabric. I then
stitched around it with black. I will
definitely be doing something like this again.
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He still loves the fabric. Caaarrrs!</div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08364772406101391283noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-417447597599890025.post-35698319486401998822015-05-16T22:11:00.001-05:002015-05-16T22:21:36.192-05:00Summer Swimsuit <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Hi everyone. It's <a href="http://www.projectrunplay.com/">Project Run and Play</a> time again and this month's pattern is <a href="http://craftycupboard.net/2013/04/summer-chevrons-shirt/">this sweet little shirt</a> by Melanie at <a href="http://craftycupboard.net/blog/">The Crafty Cupboard. </a> I really enjoy these challenges as they almost always stretch me to do something challenging in sewing, especially in the area of adapting patterns. <br />
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I have had on my list of sewing challenges to conquer, sewing swimwear. I was scared of that stretchy, slippery stuff they're made of and so it has been put off. However, my last trip to the pool convinced me that my frumpy "thing I wear which I will not show you" needs to go. As I have looked for a modest and attractive option, I really want to make my own. I am scared out of my mind and probably won't do it, but I want to. I want to in the same way which I want to sleep outside with a cougar screaming in the background. It would be a thrilling adventure. . .<br />
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Anyway, the first step is to conquer my fear of the fabric. For me the best way to do this is to sew for my baby girl. She is my official sewing guinea pig. She can actually almost get a swimsuit out of a thrifted one piece. Sewing for her is so much more fun than sewing for me. Plus, she needed a swimsuit.<br />
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Goodwill find about to be cut into.</div>
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Drawing the pattern was easier than I expected. I just traced a onesie, and used the Chevron shirt pattern to draw in the details. Cutting the pieces out of the thrifted suit was tricky. There simply wasn't enough for the black base layer. Fortunately I found a piece of four way stretch Lycra in my stash and was able to save the black base layer of the adult suit for my fully lined bodice. </div>
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I made the sleeves shorter and rufflier. I put a tie in the back instead of buttons. I bound the leg holes with the skirt fabric. I really love how it turned out. </div>
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Sewing with the fabric was much easier than I expected. Maybe it was the awful thin jersey knit that I made the muslin out of. Anything is better than that stuff I guess. Am I the only one who finds quality swimsuit knit easier to work with than low quality jersey? Maybe the key word is quality. Incidentally , if the lady who cuts your fabric says "Bless your heart*, honey" about your fabric, that might be a hint. Janalin is still learning to value quality over cheap price, but learning I am. </div>
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Anyway, I like sewing with this stuff! I will definitely be making her more swimwear. As for a swimsuit for me, I don't know. Has anyone tried it?</div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">*Bless your heart is southern shorthand for "I like to think I'm too nice to tell you, but you're doing something stupid."</span></div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08364772406101391283noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-417447597599890025.post-67382812089410530532015-03-08T12:28:00.000-05:002015-03-08T20:24:00.774-05:00The Sing to Me Dress <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
During our honeymoon I told my husband I wanted to spoil him and asked how. I am not sure what I expected him to say but without the slightest hesitation he answered, "Sing a lot, smile a lot, and have lots of people over." Almost three years in and that's still what my man wants. Nothing better than a smiling, singing wife, and a house full of people. I like it that way too. I mean who doesn't like to be genuinely singing and smiling. And as far as the house full of people goes, that's fun too, especially since last time we had a table full at breakfast time, he cooked for them. We go together well this funny guy and me.<br />
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This month I'm playing along with the March sewing challenge from <a href="http://www.projectrunplay.com/">Project Run and Play</a>. We were to take <a href="http://www.mesewcrazy.com/2015/02/knot-dress-free-pattern.html">this dress pattern</a> and do something with it. The dress is cute, but I have to say that when I saw that <a href="http://www.mesewcrazy.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/02/Free-18-inch-doll-knot-dress.jpg">doll dress hanging on the clothline</a> something clicked. It was just begging to become a pinafore over a ruffly backed dress. So I skipped the original dress and graded the doll dress up to size 6-9 months to fit the little lady. <br />
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I am very much a beginner at pattern sizing. I printed the original pattern and also pulled out my <a href="http://thestitchingscientist.com/2013/07/the-baby-dress-6-9-months-free-pattern-and-tutorial.html">6-9 month size free pattern from The Stitching Scientist.</a> I have made this pattern before and know that it sews up nicely and, importantly, fits my baby. <br />
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To make my pattern I lay the doll dress over the dress it was supposed to go on top of and drew what I thought would fit. It kind of worked. I learned a bit and will try again next time. For making patterns I use wrapping paper. It is light weight, comes in a big roll, and has a one inch grid on the back. </div>
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I sewed the dress first. I cut the pieces out as I would to make a regular peasant dress except I left the bottom half off of the back. I sewed the four pieces together and ended up with this. <br />
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This fabric takes me back a year to when first found out I would have a little girl to sew for. I went to Walmart and stocked up on cheap fabric to practice on. Even though it is cheap Walmart fabric, I love it. It is such a cheery bright green and has these adorable little birds on it. Can you tell I'm ready for spring?<br />
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Next I cut the biggest piece of the fabric I had left into three 3 1/4" strips and made them into ruffles. An excellent tutorial on making a ruffle skirt is available <a href="http://thestitchingscientist.com/2014/10/triple-layer-ruffle-skirt.html">here.</a> When I added the top and middle ruffles I added a lace ruffle. I simply placed it under the green ruffle and sandwiched it all together. Since my major (only) grip with the peasant dress is that it's hard to get those baby arms into the sleeves, I added a key hole and button closure to the back. I used the neckline elastic to make the button loop; just made it stick out the casing, folded it back over and closed it all up. <br />
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<div>
With the dress done, I could finish the pinafore. I placed my cut out pinafore over the front of the dress and suddenly realized that my pattern grading hadn't gone as well as I thought. That 18" doll pattern wasn't intended for a 7 month old baby and I hadn't sized the neckline up properly. Oh well. Then followed a series of crazy sewing makeshift that I will spare you. When it was all over I had this. <br />
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<div>
That lovely ribbon covers up some things you probably just shouldn't do in sewing. It does it quite nicely I think. The shoes are from Amber over at <a href="http://crazylittleprojects.com/2012/10/mary-jane-baby-girl-shoes-tutorial-and-pattern.html">Crazy Little Projects</a>. They are lovely, but they don't stay on. Can we really expect that? <br />
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This is my Sing to Me Dress full of singing birds and butterflies. It's a reminder to serious little me that at the end of the day, singing, smiling, and having lots of people over, isn't such a bad way to live. Happy Spring!<br />
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She gives Daddy plenty of smiles</div>
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unless he's pointing a camera at her. . .then no.</div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08364772406101391283noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-417447597599890025.post-47489623177958805932013-07-21T22:27:00.000-05:002013-07-21T22:27:36.597-05:00My Journey of Joy: The Beautiful Birth of Enoch Leach<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Foreword: This is my experience. It is one of the most beautiful and sacred
things that has ever happened to me. I almost
hesitate to share it publically for fear of being misunderstood. Not every mother has had an experience like
mine and I mean no condemnation to anyone who has chosen to give birth differently
than I have. I hope others will give me
the same respect. If you had a horrible
labor and got an epidural or planned a caesarean, or screamed curses and vowed
you’d never do it again, I totally admire you for giving birth, for giving life
to a child. Your birth was just as sacred
as mine. Now, simply let me share my
story. Just please, let’s not let the
controversial aspects of birth detract from the beauty of it. <o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPfnNNM1T_hBQXL83tBq9uGXwcMHihQ8_Afh6rnpLhXg_8AcCEKeAiDpaHthpwHjIeRxDSs8k7nlXMrN8wK-Jn7NV3sRAchKxdK3cyt62kO2farUmxkYhanNIU6R_RLNqQGEXBh-qdDZo/s1600/IMG_1314.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPfnNNM1T_hBQXL83tBq9uGXwcMHihQ8_Afh6rnpLhXg_8AcCEKeAiDpaHthpwHjIeRxDSs8k7nlXMrN8wK-Jn7NV3sRAchKxdK3cyt62kO2farUmxkYhanNIU6R_RLNqQGEXBh-qdDZo/s400/IMG_1314.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><br /></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
From the time I first learned of the marvelous, mysterious
thing that is childbirth I have looked forward to it with a mixture of
anticipation and dread. It seems that
every mother has a horror story or two of hours of excruciating pain and
agony. Yet something in my heart knew
that it was an experience I did not want to avoid. Though afraid of pain, I wanted the reward of
childbirth: a baby. When I was courting
Stephen, I read the birth story of a friend who had given birth naturally in
water. I read about her pain, but then
there came the moment when her little girl was placed in her arms. With tears I realized that any pain would be
worth that moment. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Before and during my pregnancy I did a lot of research on
birth and Stephen and I decided on a home birth with a professional midwife. We greatly appreciated the personal support
and quality care we received from our midwives.
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
My pregnancy went well with an average amount of
discomforts. As the time for Enoch’s
birth drew closer I grew in faith and courage.
With prayers and joyful anticipation I prepared for the birth of my
firstborn son.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I went into labor at midnight on May the 24<sup>th</sup>. I tried to go back to sleep but it just
wasn’t happening even though the contractions were still more than twenty
minutes apart. I told Stephen to try to
sleep and went to the living room to pace around. I was really excited! I found that movement was key to relaxing
through the contractions (which never got as bad as I thought they would.) During those early ones I would lean against
the wall and rock my lower body and sing “Jesus Loves Me” to myself. I hadn’t planned that, but looking back it
makes sense that I would choose a song that had meant love, safety, and
happiness to me since I was a baby. I
also spent some time with God reconnecting.
I found that prayer really helped, not because I couldn’t handle the
pain, but because it was so necessary for me to let go and I needed to trust
myself to Someone bigger than myself. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I was really afraid of overreacting to labor so I convinced
myself that I was still really early and could handle it all just fine on my
own. Still I thought maybe my Mom would
be awake, (it was now in the early hours of the morning) and would like to know
what was going on. She immediately
wanted to get in the car and come be with me.
I didn’t think I needed her yet, but didn’t tell her that. My dad wanted to come too, which I hadn’t
planned, but, since I knew he was really nervous about his daughter having a
baby, I thought it would be good to let him come to the house anyway. We had the birth pool set up in our bedroom
and a door separates the living room/ dining room/kitchen from the bedrooms and
bathrooms, so he could be close without actually being in the room. He spent the time in the living room waiting
for progress updates and probably had the roughest experience of any of
us. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
After I got off the phone I decided to call my midwife,
Shea, and give her a heads up. My
contractions were well within the every five minute range and even though I
didn’t think they were that intense, I decided to call her. I knew she was out of town for an infant
resuscitation course that was required to keep her license and that her
partner, Barbara, would have to come to the birth instead. I really like Barbara so that was no problem although
I was disappointed Shea couldn’t be there.
Shea was also disappointed that the baby was coming when she couldn’t
come herself. She asked if I had tried
going back to sleep, but after timing the contractions that came during the
call she knew this was the real thing.
She told me to call Barbara when I thought I needed to. I told her that since my mom had worked her
whole nursing career in labor and delivery I thought she could probably check
me when she arrived and we would call Barbara depending on what she found. She thought that was a good idea and advised
me to wake Stephen up in the meantime. I
was ready for some support. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I “woke” Stephen (he wasn’t asleep) and he helped me through
contractions until four when my mom arrived.
I asked her to check me. I was
certain I was still at no more than 2, but she told me to call the midwife
because I was “at least a five.” I was
so relieved and happy to be that far along!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Stephen filled the birth pool which we had purchased, and I got
in. The warm water felt so good! I had a much easier time relaxing there in
the water with my mom, sister, and husband rubbing my back and arms. </div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The labor was amazing.
I felt so much love from my husband, mom, and sister that it was very
manageable. As I got closer to full
dilation, and the contractions got more intense, Barbara had to keep reminding
me not to fight. As I would come to
those moments I would recite a Bible verse in my mind and I would calm right
down. I could not believe how much it
actually helped. I really didn’t think
that would work for me like that. The
time went by and looking back it really doesn’t feel like it could have been as
long as it was.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Finally, after nine hours of labor, I was ready to push. I
pushed for a while. It took a few tries
to figure out how, and then I went for it, certain my baby would be in my arms
in no time. An hour went by. And then another. It was much harder work than I expected,
although not as painful as it might have been.
After two more hours of pushing, I was starting to get discouraged and
questioned whether I would be able to give birth naturally. We tried a few different positions and
finally I felt him move. I will forever
be grateful that I didn’t have an epidural, because that feeling of his head
moving gave me the strength to finish.
At 1:20, four and a half hours after I started pushing, Enoch was born
and immediately placed in my arms. No
way can I describe this moment! My little
boy looked up at me with a trusting inquisitive look. “Hi Precious,” I said. Stephen held me as I held Enoch and we kissed
and cried together. </div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Looking back, I am certain that if I had been in a hospital,
I would have been given a c section. I
would have consented to it. It really
looked like my small bone structure was preventing his birth, but Barbara was
so calm and confident (and careful to check his heart rate very frequently)
that we didn’t panic. I kept trying and
I did it. Only by the grace of God, but
I did it. I didn’t even tear. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I really think there is a huge difference between labor pain
and other forms of pain. It is such a
happy kind of pain I think. I felt so
safe and loved and excited that my baby was coming that it could no way have
been called suffering. Every other kind
of pain (except maybe vigorous exercise) feels like an injury, like something
is wrong. This isn’t like that, at least
not for me. I do think though that it is
worth it to prepare yourself for pain.
Also I know that some women have had a much harder time than I did and
have been in worse pain. I don’t want to
trivialize someone else’s experience, but that is how it was for me. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Giving birth was a life changing experience for me. I no longer fear childbirth. (Watch my next one be terrible, I know.) I believe that God allowed couples to be
given an experience to prepare them to raise children in a world full of sin
and danger, a world that calls for every ounce of parental strength. I feel that going through this experience
together with Stephen helped me to love and trust him more. Also it taught me to look to God for strength
when the demands of motherhood are too much.
Just as God used the curse of hard work tilling the soil as a blessing
to men, he turns the curse of pain in childbirth into a blessing for
women. There can even be joy in it. God is like that. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And did I mention I can’t get enough of my precious
baby? <span style="font-family: Wingdings; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-char-type: symbol; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-symbol-font-family: Wingdings;">J</span>
</div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Wingdings; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-char-type: symbol; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-symbol-font-family: Wingdings;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08364772406101391283noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-417447597599890025.post-38360899382768418542013-07-10T11:58:00.005-05:002013-07-15T08:53:51.522-05:0030 Years Later<div class="MsoNormal">
Dear Mom and Dad,</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
July 10, 1983 Chewelah, Washington. I wasn’t there, but I am sure it was a bit
like my wedding a year ago. Lot’s of
friends, lot’s of pictures, lot’s of details. Hopes, dreams, plans, promises meant to be
kept.</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhXm92FMMkP040S7OwFs6McZ-WMQOSRcEurnhVTvSHAVNqmWLE4JTG7QSaRAR7BZNToMKoBDZjkCegm-YrUrW-8mS4BSUnSPvq4dPshLeMKkS_BE9NfdjGOwJIQ_RDwJVqT4Y2LmrESmEI/s1600/Mom+and+Dad+Wedding.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhXm92FMMkP040S7OwFs6McZ-WMQOSRcEurnhVTvSHAVNqmWLE4JTG7QSaRAR7BZNToMKoBDZjkCegm-YrUrW-8mS4BSUnSPvq4dPshLeMKkS_BE9NfdjGOwJIQ_RDwJVqT4Y2LmrESmEI/s640/Mom+and+Dad+Wedding.jpg" width="496" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Many things have changed in the last thirty years. You have bought and sold houses, moved from
the northwest to (gasp) Arkansas, started careers and changed to different
ones, changed to a total vegetarian lifestyle, and changed from a computer that
only displayed blinking green text, to graphic designing on flat screen. You have watched your family grow from just
the two of you and a couple cats, to one baby girl and then two. You watched those little girls grow and
shaped and molded their little lives.
You homeschooled them, taught them to read and then tried to get them to
stop reading long enough to get the dishes done. You watched them become adolescents, then
busy college students, and finally teachers.
You welcomed a new son-in-law.
You held a new baby boy. There
have been lots of changes, but the friendship you committed to thirty years ago
is still there stronger than ever. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnEDUUlJW8QoWN8ERqmiaAhAuEMSvNBHJo2LwtSl56b5IqG2IOyHsIXvhRq6Ef35MpQHsmDuGfkML7T8NvnR1GRLr1JpnDHrocHUBrQUjQoa9TPsOKojMz2HzaHoPBYheYbGRmyAbhPC0/s1600/DSC_0573+(2).JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="265" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnEDUUlJW8QoWN8ERqmiaAhAuEMSvNBHJo2LwtSl56b5IqG2IOyHsIXvhRq6Ef35MpQHsmDuGfkML7T8NvnR1GRLr1JpnDHrocHUBrQUjQoa9TPsOKojMz2HzaHoPBYheYbGRmyAbhPC0/s400/DSC_0573+(2).JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
To Beth and I your marriage
has been a granted, something we never considered not being there. Not everyone can say that to their parents. So, although I haven’t said it enough over
the years I want to say that I have always appreciated the security of the home
and family you created for us. I thank
you for the sacrifices you made to make us what we are. Thank-you for not giving up. Praise the Lord!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I wish we could all be together today. Love you both!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Janalin</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibV2wSF7pp10Pe8QUPzHXhIY_u57lx9sx0wjyAr5UVYOV-qzZEWlkEdl9sjbymqDIW_p5NY52EcPssouvmtsDwjSpbtSyS17Gb6KWtrag8fb46ervwpx1Vqr3Y2sOu5UOKLsHmR5Er2Ag/s1600/DSC_0138.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="265" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibV2wSF7pp10Pe8QUPzHXhIY_u57lx9sx0wjyAr5UVYOV-qzZEWlkEdl9sjbymqDIW_p5NY52EcPssouvmtsDwjSpbtSyS17Gb6KWtrag8fb46ervwpx1Vqr3Y2sOu5UOKLsHmR5Er2Ag/s400/DSC_0138.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08364772406101391283noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-417447597599890025.post-11578302838605133552012-07-10T12:03:00.000-05:002012-07-12T08:27:10.681-05:00Reflections on the Life of Promise<br />
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<span style="font-size: small;"><i>In February, my sister-in-law, Ruthea Wolford gave birth to her fourth child by emergency c-section. Little Promise was born in critical condition and almost died at birth. She spent the rest of her life in neo-natal intensive care in Little Rock, AR. During that time Ruthea stayed in Little Rock to be close to her. All of us prayed earnestly for her recovery from an extreme case of fetal hydrops. God said wait. On April 30, Promise fell asleep. </i></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"> <i>Yesterday, Ruthea sent me this letter she wrote to Promise. She believes that Promise is completely unware of this letter and will not know anything until Jesus wakes her up when He comes. She wrote this letter, not to communicate with Promise, but to express some of what this experience has done for her. The resulting first person letter is, well, you'll just have to read it. You might want to get a tissue box first. ~Janalin</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhRAz7igd2iCaShHZlG2grrbSk3bFB919JrGjt1U1GGAxfNDHEbBPG-sUCoJx183PtVjtRluRlRAPpjduZeHHe8KZWV95c-EhduOr2n-_3aKarrUXhLD6OHeDMrTKtRaw_VfAg-nP58qKg/s1600/Promise+in+pink.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhRAz7igd2iCaShHZlG2grrbSk3bFB919JrGjt1U1GGAxfNDHEbBPG-sUCoJx183PtVjtRluRlRAPpjduZeHHe8KZWV95c-EhduOr2n-_3aKarrUXhLD6OHeDMrTKtRaw_VfAg-nP58qKg/s640/Promise+in+pink.jpg" width="640" /></a><i> </i></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"> Although
you are safe in Jesus arms, close to His heart, and sleeping in Jesus (we know
it as death but not forever!) until He comes, I’m going to write as thought I’m
writing to you since it helps me to formulate clear thoughts. As your mommy, from the time I knew I was
carrying you, I was confident that God would be with me and strengthen us for
everything to do with the pregnancy. In
prayer time, I had assurance from God that this whole experience would be
enshrouded by a rainbow so to speak and that the end of the story would be
filled with peace and joy. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"> You were a little “missionary” sent to me from Jesus and I
know my life will NEVER be the same, both the void that you have left and the
deep lessons I’m learning. This has been
the biggest trial of my whole life and yet I believe will also be the biggest
blessing. Since your death on April 30,
I have had many questions and tears and also healing times with Jesus, although
as each day passes, I understand more of the picture. Here are some of the precious lessons I
treasure.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6fWOHl9_UM1LgRxcZPr8epYOTthyphenhyphenXrkfc9G73z_U6ji4VZk9RgnZcFNCVp9ktyCki-vSBmq3GundSOAM2mNeZla7wFwF7wD5iYiZ-MJbAxq_TRJZuYw5JgBwUBIq4cTM5KNwjFazNEXg/s1600/Ruthea+and+Promise.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6fWOHl9_UM1LgRxcZPr8epYOTthyphenhyphenXrkfc9G73z_U6ji4VZk9RgnZcFNCVp9ktyCki-vSBmq3GundSOAM2mNeZla7wFwF7wD5iYiZ-MJbAxq_TRJZuYw5JgBwUBIq4cTM5KNwjFazNEXg/s640/Ruthea+and+Promise.jpg" width="640" /></a></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"> From the womb, your life was bathed in prayer. After your traumatic birth, thousands of
prayers ascended every day for your healing as people from all over the world
and all ages started praying for you. I also
was catapulted into unceasing prayer for your little life continually hanging
in the balance. I’ll never forget the
night in the elevator when God impressed me to start praying for you every hour
with whoever I was with, by phone or in person.
It became a great blessing. I saw
many answers to those prayers for you and for others (“Thank you God!”) and
many other people joined. It wasn’t difficult
to make time to pray because your need was so great. I know that God is leading me to this same
kind of prayer experience in many areas in life, especially for your brothers
and sister (who miss you so much) as they grow and face all of life’s troubles
and temptations. God wants me to feel my
constant and great need of Him and be continually in tune.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"> In connection with that lesson, I felt helpless and <b>was</b>
helpless to heal you or help you like I wanted to. As each day passed it was a new lesson in
being cheerful with the unknown and things I was helpless in. God wants me to feel that helpless dependence
on Him each day!</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"> In the past I would feel a bit irritated about many things
and situations in life that seemed big in the moment. But now it seems that nothing holds a candle
to your fragile life that was holding on by a thread. I’m so thankful to God for this fresh
perspective. Now, nothing holds a candle
to eternity and being with Jesus. “And
the things of earth will grow strangely dim in the light of His glory and
grace”. How many people are holding on
to spiritual life just be a thread?</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgEnJEOjLPV6hlZiy2uZaZk5CatejzeKwMCDyyWX8z17k0gQsk8bEP40QjSjmJprb1FeVqUrOtRlPPYhtX63P0zMdaxjtLB3GY-KnGLQPgCV5bIn8lpmqkv_a60ow3P2Y9887y0yvuLLp4/s1600/Promise.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgEnJEOjLPV6hlZiy2uZaZk5CatejzeKwMCDyyWX8z17k0gQsk8bEP40QjSjmJprb1FeVqUrOtRlPPYhtX63P0zMdaxjtLB3GY-KnGLQPgCV5bIn8lpmqkv_a60ow3P2Y9887y0yvuLLp4/s640/Promise.jpg" width="480" /></a> When you were first born, I cried and prayed until I was
assured by God again by the quiet conviction that He HAD given you to me. I didn’t have to worry about whether or not
you would make it and I could treasure each day with you. Now, looking back I see that God is the same
God now as in Abraham’s day and just as He really gave Abraham the promised
land back then (Gen. 13), so He gave you to me. And just as Abraham received it
by faith until he possesses it with all of us, so you are still mine by faith
until we are in heaven.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"> When I saw God had given you to me, I chose then to give
you everything I had, even though I at first was inclined to hold back because
nobody had assurance that you’d make it and I didn’t want to bond with you only
to lose you. But I spent all the time I
could with you, I loved you as much as I could, I sang and prayed with you more
than I had done with Isaac, Joy, or Seth during your short life because that’s
about all I COULD do. Thanks to the
Lord, I have no regrets for my part in your life which is a wonderful example
of how God wants me to live my life every day….a life with no regrets. I see a clearer picture also of how God has
given absolutely everything to us despite the fact that the majority of us
humans don’t recognize that or love Him for it.
He keeps pouring His love out in un-numbered ways. He bonds with us even though the certainty of
spending eternity with us depends on our decision. Thank you Lord, for giving your all and
holding nothing back. “The Lord would be
so bountiful toward His human family that it cannot be said of Him that He
could do more. When He gave Jesus to our
world, He gave all heaven. His love is
without a parallel. It did not stop
short of anything.” Comments on Matthew 26:6-13</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"> Along the same line, pumping breast milk for you was a huge
trial for me. It wasn’t because it hurt
or because of the idea of feeding a pump instead of you. It was because I didn’t know if you would
ever get it, and every single time I pumped it was a reminder of how sick you
were, how much I loved you and yet couldn’t hold you, etc, etc. One day, God impressed me with the thought to
not even worry about the future of you using my milk but simply to see it as a
love gift for you right then. This is such
an example also of Jesus’ pure love to us constantly…simply because that’s what
He is, pure love with no strings attached.
What a beautiful picture into Christ’s character. I thank the Lord for the opportunity to feel
more of His heart.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimbhjM1aOtXCToloZTIHkd5mVC8iokk261lOdZPkrRO0jTsP3jTGMf4tzfe2pgPvfQVyaj2Bo3Q6bji5QJHYAkQnpT6PzKD2uj83bthizCv5z8REZqjAQQnXOfohXd5tiMNuqbHdoQl0A/s1600/Joy+with+Promise+close+up.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimbhjM1aOtXCToloZTIHkd5mVC8iokk261lOdZPkrRO0jTsP3jTGMf4tzfe2pgPvfQVyaj2Bo3Q6bji5QJHYAkQnpT6PzKD2uj83bthizCv5z8REZqjAQQnXOfohXd5tiMNuqbHdoQl0A/s640/Joy+with+Promise+close+up.jpg" width="640" /></a> Sometimes I felt almost guilty about being with you so much,
since Isaac, Joy, and Seth needed me too (although Grandma was here). Then as I prayed I realized again that I
needed to be right where I was, with YOU.
God has a place and plan for me to be every moment of each day. For each of us as His children, there may be
needs all around us that call for our attention but our focus, attention, and
energies need to be on the one place God has in mind.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"> More than anything, I wanted to hold you in my own
arms. I prayed many times that Jesus
would do that for me since I couldn’t, and I’m sure He had ways of making you
feel His snuggling. Yet that desire to
hold you personally was always there.
I’m thankful for the precious moments Daddy and I held you before you died and
I’ll always treasure that. But the trial
of not being able to hold you has also given me a deeper glimpse into God. I know He would love to hold us all close
physically and can’t wait until heaven when we will be united with Him. I thank God to feel that with Him!</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"> You had no idea that you had an unconscious influence or
even what “influence” is, but nonetheless it was great. People and nurses who were with you commented
on what a peaceful baby you were. We had
been praying all along that God’s name be glorified and we believed it could
best be done by your life. However, we still believe that His name is glorified
and claim that verse “For to me to live is Christ and to die is gain”. By your life and death, may God’s name be
truly honored. I believe you will have
many stars in your crown and yet you were totally unaware of almost everything to
do with this life except for the pain you were subjected to. You have taught us so much. You rested in Jesus…and that’s what my
position should always be…resting in Jesus.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXnAs2s74s5EVV9hcHF6VcYEIn66alD9FjDslT17PR73YYvG-fwtXQGpjFlK73u-kADNhtLnK3WwEB2ojOFnmT5YXRlp5YKrjT0KG7nxT4L-5VyJmU6AOsVe1Xhf4kwbY0CfffSLqNinQ/s1600/Michael+and+Promise.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXnAs2s74s5EVV9hcHF6VcYEIn66alD9FjDslT17PR73YYvG-fwtXQGpjFlK73u-kADNhtLnK3WwEB2ojOFnmT5YXRlp5YKrjT0KG7nxT4L-5VyJmU6AOsVe1Xhf4kwbY0CfffSLqNinQ/s640/Michael+and+Promise.jpg" width="640" /></a></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"> With your life, we have been surrounded and immersed into
hundreds of other people with intense needs too. Jesus was moved with compassion on this earth
for the crowds surrounding Him and He wants my life to be filled with
compassion also. “Lord, forgive me for
my insensitivity to needs around me. May
I ever have your compassion and know what to do about it.” I had never felt deep compassion for these
kind of needs partly because I was never really aware of all that is happening
and partly because I hadn’t suffered myself that much before. Now, my outlook is completely different and
I’ll never be the same. In the past, at times I’ve felt a bit judgmental about
other people, but I realize more now that I’ve never carried their burden and that
maybe I would make those same decisions if I was in their shoes.. I’ve entered more into God’s heart of
compassion for us humans who are just as helpless as you have been in your
little bed.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"> The time you smiled at me gave me such a feeling of joy
that I’ll never forget. God must also
long for our “smiles” of recognition and joy for who He is.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"> A few days before you died, I was overcome with sadness and
sat down to cry. After a little while,
God brought to my mind a song to sing and the thought that my remedy would be
to sing. God is in the business of
helping us humans heal and how good He is at it. Sometimes I can’t sing because of tears and
my throat is tight but then I can again.
What a help to be able to sing through the tears. I think I see deeper how music is like prayer
and connects me with God in a way to bring continual healing and help. Again, thank you God.</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEia3rERdjAGmg-aro0hTonPXHeAw_yJuKnymIBTKzzJ7y1WGUaH-cVjbxhmoUTFUCZDC3s_fnpLPoY98sK2iOTvxEenTppfv_wvK54yfE1U2moqLlmSoatBAsvt8lIrWA3rdZ2qAyw27v0/s1600/Promise+casket.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="424" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEia3rERdjAGmg-aro0hTonPXHeAw_yJuKnymIBTKzzJ7y1WGUaH-cVjbxhmoUTFUCZDC3s_fnpLPoY98sK2iOTvxEenTppfv_wvK54yfE1U2moqLlmSoatBAsvt8lIrWA3rdZ2qAyw27v0/s640/Promise+casket.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMXb2ILG-oEwq9QysR4bmueHyQKJ0YhohxVSP6WEN7nVrIyDyWEcZifAYhkyN2cryLKk3TsIvH-TEjfzPKpMFjHONCwxQ8PLHkiMrtmGlIFZW93w3MZv9MlkdzstFvI2o-0gftyiAPFV0/s1600/Wolford+Family+at+burial+black+and+white.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMXb2ILG-oEwq9QysR4bmueHyQKJ0YhohxVSP6WEN7nVrIyDyWEcZifAYhkyN2cryLKk3TsIvH-TEjfzPKpMFjHONCwxQ8PLHkiMrtmGlIFZW93w3MZv9MlkdzstFvI2o-0gftyiAPFV0/s640/Wolford+Family+at+burial+black+and+white.jpg" width="424" /></a><span style="font-size: small;"> Although I miss you terribly, I see that you had a mission
to complete which you did, so you could say with Paul, “I have fought a good
fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith: henceforth there is
laid up for me a crown of righteousness, which the Lord the righteous judge,
shall give me at that day: and not to me only, but unto all them also that love
his appearing.” 1 Timothy 4:7,8. You
were preserved and healed in the womb when the doctor didn’t think you’d make
it, you survived your birth which was another miracle, and God also worked
after your anointing in a special way.
Evidently He saw you had a special work to do, like the song I sang
every day (Come Thou Fount) and this one… “God has a plan for you, something
only you can do. You are so valuable to
Him. You are beyond compare, a precious
jewel so very rare. He gave His
everything to make you His own. God
wants just you, no one else will do.
Listen to Him call you by name.
You were in His plan before the world began and He wants you to live
your life for Him.”</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"> We
can’t wait to see you and we know it will be soon! We are so thankful God brought you into our
family!</span> </div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><b>Our faith must pierce
beyond the veil, seeing things that are invisible. No one else can look for
you. You must behold for yourself. In the place of murmuring for blessings that
are withheld, let us remember and appreciate the blessings already bestowed (MS
42, 1901). {7BC 930.11}</b></span></div>
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<br /></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08364772406101391283noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-417447597599890025.post-27128768780751201052012-07-08T18:38:00.000-05:002012-07-08T19:04:39.123-05:00Castelluzzo<br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0bIM6K6vRTT23d8l2PkZAwjIuT7nU2DMMB87ObHiHo2SykFTK8Kte_pTv3v_SKOVlABjT7E_D6p3dSTjTGQWL9Q2YvQ5-EBnJBN0WN7P2kkAeD2QT-k91YDgEMYy3fgxVAB_crS6bbBI/s1600/Adams+over+Goat+Rocks.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="425" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0bIM6K6vRTT23d8l2PkZAwjIuT7nU2DMMB87ObHiHo2SykFTK8Kte_pTv3v_SKOVlABjT7E_D6p3dSTjTGQWL9Q2YvQ5-EBnJBN0WN7P2kkAeD2QT-k91YDgEMYy3fgxVAB_crS6bbBI/s640/Adams+over+Goat+Rocks.jpg" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Sunrise on the Goat Rocks Wilderness Area with Mt Adams in the background. Washington State</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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Every mountain climbed is an experience all its own. Every one demands its own level of exertion;
every one offers its own reward; and every one sings its own song. I have seen the sun rise from Round Mountain
in Washington State and gasped at the melody of sun streaks over the lake, the
wonder of Mt. Adams towering over the Goat Rocks, and the majesty of a pink
Rainer turning to gold in the dawning light.
I could almost hear the orchestral strains of breaking dawn complimenting
the harmony of stillness. A concert that
made the strenuous moonlit hike shrink into nothingness. I have climbed the gentler slopes of Arkansas’
Ouachita Mountains. They offer a less
spectacular view and a less exhausting climb, but hum with the sweet sound of
insects and birds in harmony with the breeze rustling the beech, pine, and oak
trees. I have climb foothills in the
Italian Alps, urging myself up the last slope to feast on the sight of peaks of
three countries. The Alps swell with melody.
Waterfalls seem to gush from every cliff and rivers thunder through
every gorge. The green meadows lilt with
the music of bells worn by the flocks and herds. No two mountains offer the same; each sings a
song wonderfully its own. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizZIFTBEv3vDyB9wLdDcvv29kOFoPWv2gX6k9rizmH3J_WvyK0S6lX5MI4NyNaFce783q44hGl8RomGImshnLo-LeiXfiaV5CY4smVAg1hnpSaP6xR7Mezb_HFiUTPwYlwghcrUvdHuuw/s1600/DSC_0444.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="424" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizZIFTBEv3vDyB9wLdDcvv29kOFoPWv2gX6k9rizmH3J_WvyK0S6lX5MI4NyNaFce783q44hGl8RomGImshnLo-LeiXfiaV5CY4smVAg1hnpSaP6xR7Mezb_HFiUTPwYlwghcrUvdHuuw/s640/DSC_0444.JPG" width="640" /></a></div>
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Castelluzzo is no exception.
It was one of our easier hikes actually.
My husband and I had already climbed Monte Servin above the famed Pra
del Tor in Waldenses territory and Punto Vergio above the rugged Valley of the
Invincibles. Our honeymoon in Italy was
filled with excursions into the beauty the Alps had to offer, but Castelluzzo
was a must climb for us. There were no
cow bells or vast fields of wildflowers, and the clouds obstructed what vista
there might have been. We were there to
claim the reward of standing where a battle was fought and gloriously won. We were there to hear the song of the
martyrs.</div>
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We were oddly silent on this hike. I listened to the sighing of the trees, the thud
of solid ground beneath my feet, and the roar of the distant river. My mind was taking in, not just the beauty of
the tree covered heights, but the scene of 500 years ago. I saw lines of people climbed the trail
before me. I saw babies in their
mother’s arms. I saw terrified little
faces, anguished lips moving in silent prayer, and calm determined eyes. I saw hateful stares and malicious
smirks. I saw drawn swords and other
hideously ugly weapons drawn to prevent any attempt of escape. Only one escape was offered: renounce this
heresy, this idea that one could be saved without the intercession of priest
and saints, say mass, go to confession, and you may walk down this mountain and
live. My line of people kept
climbing. My husband and I
followed. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Isaac Watt’s hymn was playing in the background of my mind. <i>Am I a
soldier of the cross, a follower of the Lamb? And shall I fear to own His
cause, or blush to speak His name? </i></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMBkZJDDyV5-0Wo9-FFY2Mx4k0idWkWUUd60d0kvt3MrPlgiTHZEOkYtdvWf1utXRMd6lOXBjW1zkLOCnf5e9l7LEJZXzF-gbB1_YRFk-m-w2gb01mg_pvLRvuCHMh8e8NfEaqjBVo4aE/s1600/DSC_0761.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="424" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMBkZJDDyV5-0Wo9-FFY2Mx4k0idWkWUUd60d0kvt3MrPlgiTHZEOkYtdvWf1utXRMd6lOXBjW1zkLOCnf5e9l7LEJZXzF-gbB1_YRFk-m-w2gb01mg_pvLRvuCHMh8e8NfEaqjBVo4aE/s640/DSC_0761.JPG" width="640" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The night before I had sung that song in the Tempio Valdesi
in Pra del Tor, wheezing the notes out of the antique pump organ. Suddenly, the message of the song
overwhelmed me. I assessed the last few
years of my life. Lately the passion for
God that had filled me in earlier days was lacking. Maturity and experience had tempered my zeal
with reality. Although I still
experienced many moments of joy and even fun in ministry, some days, I honestly
just wanted to quit. But now I knew I
couldn’t. The weariness with ministry, the growing reluctance to take on
responsibility, the longing for a quiet life of ease and contentment, the
frustration with working hard and feeling that it was never enough, all came
home to me in that moment. I felt like a
plastic toy soldier next to a seasoned warrior as I compared myself to those
who had endured so much without complaining.
With tears I told God that whatever He asked of me would be done
cheerfully. Now this climb up
Castelluzzo. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
We entered a beautiful meadow. How peaceful, I thought. It seemed hard to believe this was the scene
of such ugliness. Grass covered the top
reaching from the forest on the back to the rocky cliffs before us. I could still see my Valdesi friends marching
through this field and I knew what was next.
Maybe there was one last chance; one more attempt to convert their
victims to their system. This being
denied, the men, women, and little children were taken around the last boulder.
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
My tears flowed freely now.
The men who had committed no crime but courageous faith, the mothers who
had taught the words of the gospels to their children, the innocent little ones
too young to understand, the young bride like me, full of dreams of a simple
life with husband and children, all were thrown over the cliff. The soldier returned to the fort in the
valley. My husband and I were left to
walk back down the trail in peace. </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0LeOZwq_LUtBu6_sUVA0WGegkTlkkpuz0x11JKRtHn0p_uTm6XmzK0a7itX8org0oqr54ejTlOTxJNdZlgROTzisyxeXQWjdyALShkwYFO2tDW79f2fAouITvX6PkMYJnOR7F3389cb4/s1600/DSC_0679.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="424" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0LeOZwq_LUtBu6_sUVA0WGegkTlkkpuz0x11JKRtHn0p_uTm6XmzK0a7itX8org0oqr54ejTlOTxJNdZlgROTzisyxeXQWjdyALShkwYFO2tDW79f2fAouITvX6PkMYJnOR7F3389cb4/s640/DSC_0679.JPG" width="640" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Why not me? Why was I
born in a time and place where freedom was granted and men worshiped their God
in peace? A strange mixture of gratitude
and envy surged through me. Gratitude
for freedom, envy for a faith that could conquer <i>that. </i>The song kept
playing. <i>Must I be carried to the skies on flowery beds of ease, while others
fought to win the prize or sailed through bloody seas? Are there no foes for me to face, may I not
stem the flood, is this vile world a friend of grace to help me on to God?</i> </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I crawled between two rocks in search of a quiet place out
of the wind. All was still. I saw them again, forced to this point
choosing not between a Sabbath afternoon of outreach and a nap but between life
and death. <i>Am I a Soldier? </i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I opened my Bible to Hebrews 11: 32- 40</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal;">
<i>"And what shall I more say? for
the time would fail me to tell of Gedeon, and of Barak, and of Samson, and of Jephthae; of David also, and Samuel, and of the prophets: Who through faith subdued kingdoms, wrought
righteousness, obtained promises, stopped the mouths of lions, quenched the
violence of fire, escaped the edge of the sword, out of weakness were made
strong, waxed valiant in fight, turned to flight the armies of the aliens. Women received their dead raised to life
again: and others were tortured, not accepting deliverance; that they might
obtain a better resurrection: And others
had trial of cruel mockings and scourgings, yea, moreover of bonds and
imprisonment: They were stoned, they were sawn asunder, were
tempted, were slain with the sword: they wandered about in sheepskins and
goatskins; being destitute, afflicted, tormented; (Of whom the world was not worthy:) they
wandered in deserts, and in mountains, and in dens and caves of the
earth. And these all, having obtained a
good report through faith, received not the promise: God having provided some better thing for us,
that they without us should not be made perfect.</i><i>" </i> </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Why not me? The
answer came clearly. <i>You too.
</i>The martyrs of Castelluzzo and thousands like them are asleep
waiting. It is for us to finish. We 21<sup>st</sup> century Christians who
have everything, we who stay home if it rains, we who are quick to protect our
temporal comfort and slow to protect someone else’s eternal life, <i>we </i>walk in the footsteps of the
martyrs. We are called to the same
degree of commitment. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Sure I must fight if I
would reign, increase my courage, Lord; I’ll bear the toil, endure the pain,
supported by Thy word.</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I moved closer to the edge.
My mind, heart, and soul tried to take all this in. How did they do it? Were they merely spiritual giants with no
fears? Was theirs an innate courage, some
martyr gene that hadn’t made it into my DNA?
For a long time I pondered this.
A tree moaned in the wind. The
river thundered far below. The song
played on. </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7e_RhIP3WEEnZURfkD85QKRJpbFhvLCuTBUZFgGK2mxpPbMb9zY8MFIeTUhqlBWk9QlstMhKR0JOxCC4ibIBQZV1DA2K3Um3Ia3Wg31mQmirhz92OBTEnvK3a7OtLBqACeWSQIzdZ9C4/s1600/DSC_0766.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="424" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7e_RhIP3WEEnZURfkD85QKRJpbFhvLCuTBUZFgGK2mxpPbMb9zY8MFIeTUhqlBWk9QlstMhKR0JOxCC4ibIBQZV1DA2K3Um3Ia3Wg31mQmirhz92OBTEnvK3a7OtLBqACeWSQIzdZ9C4/s640/DSC_0766.JPG" width="640" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>The saints in all this
glorious war shall conquer though they die, they see the triumph from afar with
faith’s discerning eye. </i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
They saw beyond the moment.
They saw a crown laid up ahead.
They saw a city with foundations.
They saw a robe of white and a mansion of gold. But they saw more than all One who had ever
been their Helper. They saw open arms to
catch them as they fell. They had
already proved Him in lesser trials. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The sun poked through the clouds bathing my rock with
warmth. I smiled. This grizzly place, these cruel jagged rocks,
this scene of such unspeakable evil, was a beautiful place. A victory was won here that may be repeated
in each moment of sacrifice faced by God’s people. Not by being active and zealous in our own
strength will we follow. Not by a sudden
infusion of that mysterious martyr courage will we finish this war, but by
looking beyond the moment to the One who has endured more than they all. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Hebrews 12 follows Hebrews 11. It reads. “Wherefore seeing we also are
compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every
weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset [us], and let us run with
patience the race that is set before us,
Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of [our] faith; who for the
joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set
down at the right hand of the throne of God.
For consider him that endured such contradiction of sinners against
himself, lest ye be wearied and faint in your minds.” </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
This is the secret.
Consider Him. Not once a week, or
even once a day, but every time the temptation comes to be careless. I leaned back onto the grass. My commitment of the previous night could be
kept. Any weak ordinary Christian had
have this if we will just look away from the moment, away from our problems, away
from ourselves, to one who has fought this glorious war and won. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I stood and begin to join in singing the final verse of the
song Castelluzzo had sung to me. <i>When that illustrious day shall rise and all
Thy armies shine, in robes of victory through the skies the glory shall be
Thine.</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj44rkMSFmpxzQrle7EwGQPOOG3qDIWGVN4zotH6kEAjji4Xnc5FjThyJgSgaWWfi0AyeiPzx15YnL4_2SqLpa15aZjZ_HhqM9xlDvPjn3VbDwT472-IJbtHB7eNA_5-sEs_WVVG5_g5IM/s1600/DSC_0746.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="424" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj44rkMSFmpxzQrle7EwGQPOOG3qDIWGVN4zotH6kEAjji4Xnc5FjThyJgSgaWWfi0AyeiPzx15YnL4_2SqLpa15aZjZ_HhqM9xlDvPjn3VbDwT472-IJbtHB7eNA_5-sEs_WVVG5_g5IM/s640/DSC_0746.JPG" width="640" /></a></div>
Yes a victory was won on Castelluzzo by Jesus, the One who
was so mistreated in the person of His people, and so glorified by them. The glory was His and always will be. No super Christian walked down the mountain
that day. But Jesus walked beside a
dependent one. The work was still
there. It was still hard, and seemingly
unrewarding, but it didn’t need to be doable.
I wasn’t doing it alone anymore.
Castelluzzo continued to sing it’s song, to demand its sacrifice, and my
heart had found strength to meet it. </div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08364772406101391283noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-417447597599890025.post-34982489840655282382012-02-02T08:04:00.000-06:002012-02-02T08:04:58.561-06:00Wedding WebsiteMy wedding website is up. Come and read the full story of how God brought Stephen and I together.<br />
<a href="http://www.blogger.com/goog_1272156566"><br />
</a><br />
<a href="http://www.mywedding.com/stephenandjanalin"> http://www.mywedding.com/stephenandjanalin</a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08364772406101391283noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-417447597599890025.post-143313366517410092011-08-16T21:42:00.000-05:002011-08-16T21:42:14.671-05:00The Past and the Present<i>I know, it's another poem. . . that's the only way to do this thought justice.</i><br />
<br />
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<div class="MsoNormal">The Past and the Present met on the road today,</div><div class="MsoNormal">And I shuddered to hear the words they did say!</div><div class="MsoNormal">The Past had no strength to move, bend, or change,</div><div class="MsoNormal">But oh, he had strength the present to arrange!</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">And the Future seems to shudder through the misty clouded veil,</div><div class="MsoNormal">As though afraid that like Past she must also fail,</div><div class="MsoNormal">But she cannot be seen and who knows whether she smiles</div><div class="MsoNormal">At tomorrow’s joys or bears it’s trials.<span> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">The Present quavered and the Future shook,</div><div class="MsoNormal">As the unmoving Past, my way overtook,</div><div class="MsoNormal">Then Grace appeared and forgave my Past,</div><div class="MsoNormal">Though the consequences still their shadow cast,</div><div class="MsoNormal">But the present though shaken seems to break free,</div><div class="MsoNormal">Bearing consequences cheerfully,</div><div class="MsoNormal">And leaves the Past bond by new chains,</div><div class="MsoNormal">And free and joyous victory gains,</div><div class="MsoNormal">And smiles through the rain of sorrow,</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span> </span>And looks with new hope towards tomorrow.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">The cross came between Past and Present today,</div><div class="MsoNormal">And tomorrow sleeps sweetly, hidden away,</div><div class="MsoNormal">Through mists of mystery, and curtains of trust,</div><div class="MsoNormal">For God is merciful as He is just.<span> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><i>I am thankful for grace, that yesterday's chain's need not bind, burn, or bruise. I am thankful for my Savior, my eternal Friend and Lover, and the bright hope I have for a future with Him. </i> </div><br />
<br />
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08364772406101391283noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-417447597599890025.post-11107068018918310272011-07-10T08:18:00.000-05:002011-07-10T08:20:33.102-05:00I Wish I Could Tell YouThere are no words for this, no picture can capture it, no song express it, but I wanted to share it. . . how? <br />
<br />
For a long time my blog has sat silent because I could not express this, so why am I trying now when I am so busy? It is because I am thinking about someone. I don't know your name, and you may not be any of the people who visit my blog, but I am thinking about you. You have in your heart a longing to be loved. You dream of a prince who will satisfy your every desire and make you complete. You look at the available guys around you and try to find a fit. Maybe you give one of them your heart, your soul, everything you have to give, and still you can't find it. Maybe you wait. . . for what you don't know, maybe you think it is time to give up. Maybe you feel God has forgotten you. Maybe it seems your longing for a man who will love you as Christ loves His church is hopeless idealism. Maybe you don't think there is a beautiful story for you. Maybe God is asking you to give up a relationship or a dream that means everything to you. Maybe you hesitate. . .<br />
<br />
That's why I am writing to you. I have to tell you that it <i>is</i> possible. I have to tell you that nothing can compare with God's plan. I have to tell you that the man you desire is Jesus. I have to tell you that He knows too your need of a man you can see and feel. I have to tell you that He writes love stories that are beyond compare. I long to communicate to you that if you will let your plans go, your daydreams, your attachments that are not His will, He will surprise you. I know.<br />
<br />
This spring I was swept off my feet. . . by Jesus. I could not believe that when He asked me to make Him the center of my life and to really seek holiness in my relationships with young men that He could make me so happy. I could not believe He really was satisfying me.<br />
<br />
Then, I could not believe that the dreams I had surrendered to Him were being fulfilled. I could not believe His plan was so beautiful. I could not believe He was giving me Stephen Leach. Me? <br />
<br />
I laughed tears, I cried tears, all happy ones. My only regret is that I didn't believe it sooner. My mind flew to the first years of college when I noticed him for the first time. His depth; his convictions- so balanced and practical, so uncompromising; his kindness; his enthusiasm; his interests so much like my own; his love for his church, his family, his God. I remembered my desire to be with him, to work with him, to talk to him. I remembered my determination not to get my hopes up. I remembered the conviction that I should wait on God's timing, I remembered the struggle to do it. I remembered the gradual resignation to let it all go. <br />
<br />
I breathed a pray of thankfulness to God. Thankfulness that I had allowed Him to take my dreams at last and replace them with His vision for me. Thankfulness for the principles in His messages to His people that counseled me to put my education above a relationship. Thankfulness for a family that was able to support me and point me higher. Thankfulness for the gift that I do not deserve.<br />
<br />
There is so much more I want to write, my friend. I am still thinking of you. I would like to sit down, you and he and I and tell you the story in detail. I would like to go for a walk or sit on the swing and share our hearts. I would like to tell you how beautiful this thing is. . . not just the beautiful story that is unfolding between Stephen and I, but the beautiful peace of knowing that God is directing it. I would like to look in your eyes and tell you the glory of God's way and the joy of following it.<br />
<br />
I know it sounds to good to be true. I know I can't see past the stars in my eyes. I know you don't think it can happen to you. Just try it. Try surrendering your life to God and seeing what He can do with it. Wait, trust, surrender, and let Him surprise you.<br />
<br />
Your friend,<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgkFVT9addD2YpWGI2Q0hpoWQMvurWLkEkXJtNY-dKCi_4TNw4tUeeqo1W5SiqXWtGQvaaGs9jZYqHBCCsFAScv5Fgo2dcZqY7_U6ndCV7N9sIIQvxMHH5GPtkVmF_9wmPE377yxOoY2Q4/s1600/DSC_0196.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><br />
</a></div>Janalin<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGU7KqFdEyggeSCYFHHHc9T_QMy3QBtAobA66kZksobg-x7R5YJa6KCKV2dmBKDas0Rs6T2C9HebVHzb-bM6ooeMue19TjA5yUNUWBDHxz_6sEFOFmvyAF2PbKh788dCd12MA2XqbgUP4/s1600/DSC_0232.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="214" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGU7KqFdEyggeSCYFHHHc9T_QMy3QBtAobA66kZksobg-x7R5YJa6KCKV2dmBKDas0Rs6T2C9HebVHzb-bM6ooeMue19TjA5yUNUWBDHxz_6sEFOFmvyAF2PbKh788dCd12MA2XqbgUP4/s320/DSC_0232.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08364772406101391283noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-417447597599890025.post-83085278295287741612011-04-23T13:05:00.000-05:002011-04-23T13:05:55.244-05:00How Sweet the SoundShe was wheeled to the front in her wheelchair this morning, violin in hand. She had been brought across the parking lot from the nursing home to attend church and was scheduled to play special music. While she tuned up with the piano, the Sabbath School superintendent exampled that this sister had been unable to use her right hand not very long ago and that she was going to play this morning. <br />
<br />
The piano played an introduction and she began. . . halting, shaking, stumbling. It seemed she knew how to play and was frustrated at her inability. Yet after the first few notes, I began to see a beauty in this special music that was greater than many well trained and talented able bodied musicians I have heard perform. <br />
<br />
The notes shook from the strings as they sang feebly. . ."Amazing Grace, how <i>sweet </i>the sound that saved a wretch like me. . ." In that instant I realized the message of the song. Amazing grace, not given to the strong but to the weak, not to the deserving, but to the undeserving. Not given to those who excel, but to those who by sin have been crippled, broken, and disabled, those who will never measure up. The notes of need arise from just such as these and are mingled with the perfect righteousness of Christ. The sweetness of the sound is not the sweetness of the nice little Christian who has got this thing figured out; it is the sweetness of the voice of the Son as He pleads, "My blood Father," It is the sweetness of the voice of the Father as He declares the sinner justified. The beauty of this sound over the with the trembling broken strains of our clumsy fingers on the strings of our lives, covering, changing, strengthening, perfecting. . .How sweet the sound! <br />
<br />
To use the weak things to confound the mighty. . .Beauty for ashes. . .excellence out of disability. . . Amazing Grace. Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08364772406101391283noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-417447597599890025.post-55568324954126603182011-03-09T15:40:00.000-06:002011-03-09T15:40:18.988-06:00The VineA vision.<br />
<br />
There was once a clinging vine upon a circle of trees,<br />
Forming an arbor as it grasped with its tendrils their twigs and leaves,<br />
<br />
Contented was the lovely vine, supported by these trees,<br />
Beautiful, graceful, surely this was as the vine was meant to be.<br />
<br />
But then the trees began to shake with a strong and rushing wind,<br />
The vine was shaken to the ground but clung to a few of the lower limbs.<br />
<br />
A few tendrils still held to the only support they had known,<br />
As though they would climb again just like the wind had never blown.<br />
<br />
But even this tenacious attempt was met with utter defeat,<br />
Man came and pulled down the last stands of the vine and it lay broken at their feet.<br />
<br />
No longer did the fair vine grow up the trees to the sky,<br />
It seemed all happy days were gone; the vine must surely die.<br />
<br />
Many travelers past that way; they saw the vine would they lend a hand?<br />
No, none raised it up or helped it grow, Does anyone understand?<br />
<br />
Presently an angel came and stood next to the deserted vine,<br />
He raised the vine up in his arms, all was part of a larger design.<br />
<br />
He pointed it upright saying, "Stand toward the sky and leave the sod,<br />
Stretch heavenward and let thy tendrils entwine about God.<br />
<br />
"Thou art shaken from earthly support but thou canst stand in the strength of God,<br />
And flourish without it-Rest thou only on Thy God.<br />
<br />
"Lean on Him, thy God alone and Thou shalt never lean in vain<br />
Or be shaken therefrom, and there's peace you can't explain."<br />
<br />
"I felt inexpressible relief, amounting to joy, as I saw the neglected vine cared for. I turned to the angel and inquired what these things meant. Said he: "Thou art this vine. All this thou wilt experience, and then, when these things occur, thou shalt fully understand the figure of the vine. God will be to thee a present help in time of trouble." <br />
<br />
Partly quoted from Testimonies to the Church, Volume 1, p. 584. Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08364772406101391283noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-417447597599890025.post-70032772549849619702011-03-04T20:50:00.000-06:002011-03-04T20:50:01.280-06:00Peace, Be StillOh crashing waves of fear and strife,<br />
Why should I tremble at your will,<br />
My Savior guards over my life,<br />
<br />
Peace, be still.<br />
<br />
Oh fitful waves of changing moods,<br />
Why should I let you have my will?<br />
Faith sees past the clear or clouds,<br />
Peace, be still.<br />
<br />
Oh glass topped waves of tempting things,<br />
All my need my Savior fills,<br />
Why should I give Him up for Thee?<br />
Peace, be still.<br />
<br />
In my boat the Master sleeps,<br />
But still he His vigil keeps,<br />
And not a drop of guilt or fear,<br />
Not a tremor nor a tear,<br />
No temptation, not a cloud,<br />
Not a clap of thunder loud,<br />
Come, but He can hold me fast,<br />
Till the morning comes at last.<br />
<br />
So come whatever may and will,<br />
Jesus whispers, "Peace, be still."Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08364772406101391283noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-417447597599890025.post-27281562811069186182011-02-25T18:00:00.000-06:002011-02-25T18:00:54.794-06:00Sobering Quote "It is our privilege to obtain clearer and more distinct views of the goodness and mercy of God; and why do we remain in a cold and spiritless condition? Why do we seem to be incapable of manifesting tender love and sympathy for one another? Why do we not speak forth the praises of Him who has given his life that we might have salvation? Let us offer to him continually the sacrifices of praise. Satan is always ready to discourage. He will help those whom he has discouraged to gather still more doubt and unbelief to their souls. He will make you believe that you are having a very hard time in the service of Christ, when it is not so at all. He will encourage you to think that your feelings and fancies are facts, that God is a hard master, and he will lead you, by your attitude of despondency, to misrepresent to the world the character of God, and the nature of his service. We should fix our eye upon Jesus our Saviour. We should be continually growing up into Christ our living head. We want more knowledge, more grace. New affections should be planted in our hearts to expel the old affections. Divine power must substitute high and holy motives for those that were selfish and unholy. We must follow on to know the Lord. We should educate the mind to dwell on heavenly things. We should accustom the heart to dwell in a frame of gratitude and praise. The more we praise God, the more we shall have to praise him for, and our hearts will become attuned to his praise. {RH, May 28, 1889 par. 4} <br />
<i><b> "We have altogether too much familiar intercourse with Satan. We argue with him. We enter right into conversation with him, and treat him as a guest, coming into agreement with him. It is in this way that he presents the faults of our brethren to us, and magnifies them until we can see nothing good in their characters. Some imagine that they have a wonderful zeal for God, that they are inspired to set things in order, that they have a spirit of discernment, when it is really an inspiration that Satan has imparted to them. They are possessed of a cold, unsympathetic, unforgiving, critical spirit, that is not of God at all. </b></i><br />
"We should look tenderly upon our brethren, who are encompassed with human infirmities as we are. When your brother does wrong, you have directions from your Master as to what you should do. You should go right to him in meekness and love, and make him feel that you regard him as precious in the sight of God. God holds you responsible for the treatment of your brother. If you are unkind, unforgiving, God cannot forgive you. You should be more pitiful and tender toward the erring. You should have hearts from which will flow compassion and love toward others. You should not only seek out those whom your taste would lead you to prefer, those who echo your opinions and sentiments, but you should also go to those who really need Christ-like pity and forbearance. Did Christ turn away from those who were defiled with sin, who came to him for pardon? <br />
"At one time Jesus sat in Simon's house, and a woman who was a sinner came in with an alabaster box of very precious ointment, and she broke her box and poured out the ointment on the head of Jesus. Simon criticised Jesus because he did not rebuke the woman. He thought, "This man, if he were a prophet, would have known who and what manner of woman this is that toucheth him; for she is a sinner." Jesus turned to Simon, and said, "Simon, I have somewhat to say unto thee. And he saith, Master, say on. There was a certain creditor which had two debtors: the one owned five hundred pence, and other fifty. And when they had nothing to pay, he frankly forgave them both. Tell me therefore, which of them will love him most? Simon answered and said, I suppose that he to whom he forgave most, and he said unto him, Thou hast rightly judged." Those who have lived in rebellion against God, when they do repent and turn to the Lord, are most fervent in their love. They give better service to God than those who have grown cold in his service, who have for years professed to be his children and loyal to his law. A wonderful change takes place in a truly converted soul. The old imperfections that made them uncourteous and forbidding are not manifested. They love Jesus, and those for whom he died. How do you know when you turn away from those who do not seem desirable, but that you are turning away from those for whom Jesus is seeking? Perhaps, at the very moment that you turn from them, they are in the greatest need of your tenderness and compassion. There is too much of this critical spirit, of standing back in indifference to the welfare of others. We need Christian love. We need to learn meekness and lowliness of heart in the school of Christ. We should be filled with the spirit of the message of warning and mercy which we are to bear to a dying world. We have only begun to drink of the fountain of life. As we follow on to know the Lord, increasing light will shine upon us, and our path will grow brighter and brighter unto the perfect day. <br />
"We should study more earnestly the character of our Saviour. We should imitate the lovely Pattern that God has given us. We should dwell upon the matchless charms of Jesus until there will be nothing satisfying in this perishing world. We should desire to reflect his image in kindness, in courtesy, in gentleness, and love, then "when he shall appear, we shall be like him; for we shall see him as he is. And every man that hath this hope in him purifieth himself, even as he is pure." In a little while every one who is a child of God will have his seal placed upon him. O that it may be placed upon our foreheads! Who can endure the thought of being passed by when the angel goes forth to seal the servants of God in their foreheads? <br />
" If Christ can plead for us in the heavenly sanctuary, if our works are wrought in him, if we have brought his grace and truth into our character-building, we shall be recognized by the Lord as the subjects of his kingdom. If we are the children of God, we shall love one another as Christ has loved us. This cold sternness that makes us unapproachable is not of Christ, but of Satan. Jesus said, "By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another."<i><b> Those who open the door of the heart that Jesus may come in, will be filled with love and gratitude. They will not desire to shut up the light God has given them. They will gather up the rays of divine glory, and flash them athwart the pathway of others.</b></i>" Review and Herald 5-28-1889Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08364772406101391283noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-417447597599890025.post-57487607634257663962011-02-16T05:10:00.000-06:002011-02-16T05:10:19.189-06:00Sacrifice?Sacrifice? What is an acceptable sacrifice?<br />
Is it the giving of my foolishness, my brokenness, my gruesome wounds, my joys that leave me miserable, my food that leaves me hungry, my drink that leaves me thirsty? Is the renouncing of sin sacrifice? Never! <br />
To call giving up our poison to the One who gave up all to drink it sacrifice shows that we have no true understanding of sin not love for God.<br />
What is sacrifice?<br />
Is requires the giving of something good. Something that would be worthwhile to retain. A sacrifice must be something that we have every right to keep. If it is sinful to keep losing it wouldn't be sacrifice, it would be salvation.<br />
Yet even the good things we halfheartedly give, looking over our shoulder to see if anyone saw. . . are they really sacrifice? What if He asks for the best? Is even my best sacrifice? <br />
And what about being a living sacrifice. If I am to be a living sacrifice, I must be perfected by another sacrifice. The perfect life of Jesus must make my life an acceptable sacrifice.<br />
What is sacrifice? Look at Calvary. . . what else? Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08364772406101391283noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-417447597599890025.post-57817807246443559332011-02-07T18:47:00.000-06:002011-02-07T18:47:03.362-06:00To the (former) SuperteacherThey need you,<br />
They cling to you,<br />
They reach for you,<br />
<br />
You love them,<br />
You pity them,<br />
You long to help them,<br />
You wish you could save them,<br />
But you can't.<br />
<br />
It's too big,<br />
It will not shrink,<br />
And you'll never grow into it,<br />
It grows with you. <br />
<br />
You stress over it,<br />
<br />
You just can't do it.<br />
You work for it,<br />
You give it everything,<br />
Tomorrow you'll do it, <br />
But you don't.<br />
<br />
You have to do it!<br />
You want to do it!<br />
They need you to do it!<br />
But they don't.<br />
<br />
They need more than a teacher,<br />
They need a Savior,<br />
They need more than a friend,<br />
They need a Father.<br />
Just give up.<br />
<br />
And now that you've done that,<br />
Look at your Savior,<br />
They aren't the only ones who need Him you know.<br />
<br />
He can fill their need,<br />
You can only feel it,<br />
He can actually change them,<br />
You can only modify them<br />
<br />
So let Him.<br />
<br />
Pray, trust, pray, trust, work<br />
Work how? He'll show you. <br />
He's the teacher now.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08364772406101391283noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-417447597599890025.post-29718286966547614382011-02-06T20:01:00.000-06:002011-02-06T20:01:24.522-06:00Home is. . .. . . where the magabooks are. (Warning: What follows is an extremely sentimental tribute to OHC canvassing programs. Non canvassers read at your own risk.) <br />
<br />
The rain is falling around me as I search the edge of the street for something that looks familiar. A few wrong turns, a quick consultation with Google Maps, and (gasp) a phone call for better directions and I am finally on the right road. I am searching for home. I can't stand not being home on Friday night. I am looking for home in an unfamiliar city in Northern Georgia. <br />
<br />
I think of the Facebook message that lead me here and the drive down from Tennessee in the sunset and first hours of the Sabbath. Mostly I think of me hope of spending at least a few hours with old friends (I don't even know for sure which ones) who share my love of souls, scripture, and spiritual consecration. Finally I can make out the words "Seventh-day Adventist Church" on the glowing sign next to a dark driveway. Within seconds I was parked next to a familiar looking gray fifteen passenger van with an Arkansas license plate. Through the window I could see familiar faces gathered in little groups in the fellowship hall, some talking, some reading Bibles, one strumming a guitar. How many Friday evenings have I spent like this! <br />
<br />
I run to the door and knock. Within minutes I am surrounded by fellow OHC canvassers. Heidi Hunt is thrilled (my surprise worked!) Excitedly I begin catching my brothers and sisters up on the last events in my life. In the middle of my speech/conversation James Prest enters the room. He walks up and shakes my hand. "I heard your voice from the other room," he says, "And the first thing I thought was 'Hot Dog!" (You may have to know James to completely understand.) Everyone laughs. Ace laughs so hard he falls off his chair. (You may have to know Ace to completely understand.) No doubt about it, I am home. <br />
<br />
Everything about this setting says OHC canvassing program. From the magabook boxes lined up along the wall, to the piles of fruit and bread on the corner table, to the radios plugged in to every socket in the room, to a Privett brother or two playing "Come Thou Fount" on the guitar," this was the environment that did so much to shape the last four and a half years of my life. This is the environment where my faith was tested to the max. This is where I have gotten discouraged, nearly quite, and been inspired to try again. I laughingly think that I am as at home in a sleeping bag on the floor of an Adventist church in a strange city as I am in my own bed. I drop my bags in the mother's room next to Heidi and Natalie and try to sleep. (Yeah right, I have barely talked to Heidi in two months and we are supposed to be quiet and go to sleep? Girls will be girls. . . not an excuse just a statement.) <br />
<br />
Morning comes early. I turn over and consider sleeping in but am overwhelmed by a burden on my heart. The excitement of last night is overshadowed by the burdens of student teaching. Heidi turns and notices my tears. Gently she draws me to explain what is wrong and points me back to Jesus. We grab our laptops and go to the fellowship hall. Together we read a passage that so completely addressed the issues I was facing that I was stunned. (Read "A Lively Hope" on your EGW CD-ROM). Heidi too was blessed and we read until breakfast. <br />
<br />
The day passes much to quickly, filled with get acquainted chats with church members, an uplifting church service, a hike in nature, and what I was most hungry for: deep Bible conversations with people who understand it, understand the times we are living in, and understand my purpose in such conversations. All of my friends seem to be on fire about the sanctuary message they heard from Pastor Baute last weekend. I am envious, but drink in whatever blessings they are willing to share. <br />
<br />
Toward evening I sit in a chair in the foyer and studied the Bible with a friend. We look at passages in the Psalms that speak about the sanctuary. Passage after passage seem to be saying something profound to me. As Jensen point out that Isaiah 2 is about the sanctuary I think of Psalm 46. That takes us to Psalms 27, 23, 91, 61, and other passages that all seem to be saying that the sanctuary is the refuge for God's people during the time of trouble. I am struck with the thought that the sanctuary is home for God's people. Psalm 84, my favorite Psalm suddenly becomes far more meaningful. It is then that I realize that I have found home. Not OHC, not my friends, not the familiar floor of an unfamiliar building, not any of these, no. I have found a home in the Sanctuary. I wish to abide there all the time. <br />
<br />
Suddenly it all falls into place. OHC is not my sanctuary. It can not protect me and save, it can only point me to the true sanctuary. The close fellowship of a canvassing program is a blessing, but only as it leads me to closer fellowship with Christ and a deeper earnestness to save souls. I return home with a song of thankfulness in my heart for the blessing of Jesus. <br />
<br />
Maybe home isn't always where the magabooks are, or even where the people I care about most are, the ones I didn't see this weekend. Maybe it is wherever Jesus is. Right now that is the Most Holy Place. By faith I can live there! Oh to understand this better! To take it in and make it a part of me. To dwell in Him so closely that I am never moved away! This is home. . . thanks for reminding me guys. Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08364772406101391283noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-417447597599890025.post-85630157549629402662011-01-31T05:24:00.000-06:002011-01-31T05:24:52.266-06:00Repentance a Gift of God "Repentance, as well as forgiveness, is the gift of God through Christ. It is through the influence of the Holy Spirit that we are convicted of sin and feel our need of pardon. None but the contrite are forgiven; but it is the grace of God that makes the heart penitent. He is acquainted with all our weaknesses and infirmities, and He will help us. <br />
"Some who come to God by repentance and confession, and even believe that their sins are forgiven, still fail of claiming, as they should, the promises of God. They do not see that Jesus is an ever-present Saviour; and they are not ready to commit the keeping of their souls to Him, relying upon Him to perfect the work of grace begun in their hearts. While they think they are committing themselves to God, there is a great deal of self-dependence. There are conscientious souls that trust partly to God and partly to themselves. They do not look to God, to be kept by His power, but depend upon watchfulness against temptation and the performance of certain duties for acceptance with Him. There are no victories in this kind of faith. Such persons toil to no purpose; their souls are in continual bondage, and they find no rest until their burdens are laid at the feet of Jesus. <br />
"There is need of constant watchfulness and of earnest, loving devotion, but these will come naturally when the soul is kept by the power of God through faith. We can do nothing, absolutely nothing, to commend ourselves to divine favor. We must not trust at all to ourselves or to our good works; but when as erring, sinful beings we come to Christ, we may find rest in His love. God will accept every one that comes to Him trusting wholly in the merits of a crucified Saviour. Love springs up in the heart. There may be no ecstasy of feeling, but there is an abiding, peaceful trust. Every burden is light; for the yoke which Christ imposes is easy. Duty becomes a delight, and sacrifice a pleasure. The path that before seemed shrouded in darkness becomes bright with beams from the Sun of Righteousness. This is walking in the light as Christ is in the light." <br />
<i>Faith and Works p. 38, 39</i>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08364772406101391283noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-417447597599890025.post-44503263130873122012011-01-30T13:47:00.000-06:002011-01-30T13:47:11.305-06:00Ready for Either<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <o:DocumentProperties> <o:Author>Mark & Sherilyn</o:Author> <o:Version>12.00</o:Version> </o:DocumentProperties> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:WordDocument> <w:View>Normal</w:View> <w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:TrackMoves/> <w:TrackFormatting/> <w:PunctuationKerning/> <w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/> <w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid> <w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent> <w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText> <w:DoNotPromoteQF/> <w:LidThemeOther>EN-US</w:LidThemeOther> <w:LidThemeAsian>X-NONE</w:LidThemeAsian> <w:LidThemeComplexScript>X-NONE</w:LidThemeComplexScript> <w:Compatibility> <w:BreakWrappedTables/> <w:SnapToGridInCell/> <w:WrapTextWithPunct/> <w:UseAsianBreakRules/> <w:DontGrowAutofit/> <w:SplitPgBreakAndParaMark/> <w:DontVertAlignCellWithSp/> <w:DontBreakConstrainedForcedTables/> <w:DontVertAlignInTxbx/> <w:Word11KerningPairs/> <w:CachedColBalance/> </w:Compatibility> <w:BrowserLevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel> <m:mathPr> <m:mathFont m:val="Cambria Math"/> <m:brkBin m:val="before"/> <m:brkBinSub m:val="--"/> <m:smallFrac m:val="off"/> <m:dispDef/> <m:lMargin m:val="0"/> <m:rMargin m:val="0"/> <m:defJc m:val="centerGroup"/> <m:wrapIndent m:val="1440"/> <m:intLim m:val="subSup"/> <m:naryLim m:val="undOvr"/> </m:mathPr></w:WordDocument> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:LatentStyles DefLockedState="false" DefUnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<div class="MsoNormal"><b></b></div><div class="MsoNormal">I stand as the property of my Lord,</div><div class="MsoNormal">Before a heavy plow,</div><div class="MsoNormal">Ready to serve in any field,</div><div class="MsoNormal">Where He may send me now.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">I stand as the property of my Lord,</div><div class="MsoNormal">Before an altar made of stone,</div><div class="MsoNormal">Ready to bleed and give me life,</div><div class="MsoNormal">And the choice is His alone.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">The field is hard and full of stones,</div><div class="MsoNormal">But I’ll go in this my might,</div><div class="MsoNormal">For I am yoked up with my Lord,</div><div class="MsoNormal">It’s easy, the burden is light.</div><div class="MsoNormal">A life of service, whatever the toil,</div><div class="MsoNormal">On stony, hard, or thorny soil,</div><div class="MsoNormal">To go wherever Jesus leads,</div><div class="MsoNormal">However and with whoever,</div><div class="MsoNormal">In whatever way that He sees fit,</div><div class="MsoNormal">He’ll be with me forever.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">The altar is bloody, it may mean,</div><div class="MsoNormal">A death to all my cherished dreams,</div><div class="MsoNormal">Or pain with all its dread and fear,</div><div class="MsoNormal">But in the east, morning beams.</div><div class="MsoNormal">And all the weeping of the night </div><div class="MsoNormal">Cannot endure the morning light,</div><div class="MsoNormal">And pain, and sacrifice and death,</div><div class="MsoNormal">The loss of the last thing I have left,</div><div class="MsoNormal">Mean nothing, when by faith I behold</div><div class="MsoNormal">The glitter of the streets of gold.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">I stand as the property of my Lord,</div><div class="MsoNormal">Facing altar or plow, fearing neither,</div><div class="MsoNormal">For He Himself has gone before,</div><div class="MsoNormal">So I am ready for either.<span> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08364772406101391283noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-417447597599890025.post-46492939590609295402011-01-25T19:45:00.000-06:002011-01-25T19:45:51.180-06:00DialogueCharacters: An all powerful yet helpless Father; a rebellious, defiant child<br />
<br />
<br />
"Even though it hurts that you don't like me, I am more concerned with your bad attitude. What is making you act this way?" <i>Nothing, I don't have to be acting the way I am. </i><br />
"Then why are you doing it?" <i>Because I don't like you. </i><br />
"But it is hurting <b>you</b> not me! You won't be able to hold a job, have a happy home, or make lasting friendships with an attitude like that. The other children are annoyed by your attitude. You can't ever be happy this way!" (Defiant smile, challenging eyes, silence.) <br />
"Child?" (more silence.)<br />
"I care about you. Please. . . "(no answer, same eyes.)<br />
(Noise, other people show up, other distractions)<br />
The child retreats into the relative comfort of isolation from the Father. . . The Father cries.<br />
Will she ever understand? Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08364772406101391283noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-417447597599890025.post-29759640640018277542011-01-19T19:38:00.000-06:002011-01-19T19:38:37.308-06:00Against the Whole World: Me or Jesus?<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:WordDocument> <w:View>Normal</w:View> <w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:TrackMoves/> <w:TrackFormatting/> <w:PunctuationKerning/> <w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/> <w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid> <w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent> <w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText> <w:DoNotPromoteQF/> <w:LidThemeOther>EN-US</w:LidThemeOther> <w:LidThemeAsian>X-NONE</w:LidThemeAsian> <w:LidThemeComplexScript>X-NONE</w:LidThemeComplexScript> <w:Compatibility> <w:BreakWrappedTables/> <w:SnapToGridInCell/> <w:WrapTextWithPunct/> <w:UseAsianBreakRules/> <w:DontGrowAutofit/> <w:SplitPgBreakAndParaMark/> <w:DontVertAlignCellWithSp/> <w:DontBreakConstrainedForcedTables/> <w:DontVertAlignInTxbx/> <w:Word11KerningPairs/> <w:CachedColBalance/> </w:Compatibility> <m:mathPr> <m:mathFont m:val="Cambria Math"/> <m:brkBin m:val="before"/> <m:brkBinSub m:val="--"/> <m:smallFrac m:val="off"/> <m:dispDef/> <m:lMargin m:val="0"/> <m:rMargin m:val="0"/> <m:defJc m:val="centerGroup"/> <m:wrapIndent m:val="1440"/> <m:intLim m:val="subSup"/> <m:naryLim m:val="undOvr"/> </m:mathPr></w:WordDocument> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:LatentStyles DefLockedState="false" DefUnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<div class="MsoNormal">I was struck this evening with the thought that I am contending with great powers for the minds, hearts, and souls of my students.<span> </span>Everything in the world is calculated to tear down the principles that I am trying to build up for the foundation can even be laid.<span> </span>One little teacher with a bunch of lesson plans and a big smile isn’t going to be able to do anything against the media, the lack of family strength, and the materialism that attacks these kids.<span> </span>Only the power of God will make my students into powerful men and women of God.<span> </span>I can never take the credit for anything good.<span> </span>Even if I become the best teacher in the world I will still be helpless against the world, but Jesus is strong!<span> </span>I pray that He will live in me, love through me, and teach through me.<span> </span></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08364772406101391283noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-417447597599890025.post-63686959948690175842011-01-18T19:50:00.000-06:002011-01-18T19:50:36.264-06:00Thoughts on Contentment<div style="font-family: inherit;"><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:WordDocument> <w:View>Normal</w:View> <w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:TrackMoves/> <w:TrackFormatting/> <w:PunctuationKerning/> <w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/> <w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid> <w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent> <w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText> <w:DoNotPromoteQF/> <w:LidThemeOther>EN-US</w:LidThemeOther> <w:LidThemeAsian>X-NONE</w:LidThemeAsian> <w:LidThemeComplexScript>X-NONE</w:LidThemeComplexScript> <w:Compatibility> <w:BreakWrappedTables/> <w:SnapToGridInCell/> <w:WrapTextWithPunct/> <w:UseAsianBreakRules/> <w:DontGrowAutofit/> <w:SplitPgBreakAndParaMark/> <w:DontVertAlignCellWithSp/> <w:DontBreakConstrainedForcedTables/> <w:DontVertAlignInTxbx/> <w:Word11KerningPairs/> <w:CachedColBalance/> </w:Compatibility> <w:BrowserLevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel> <m:mathPr> <m:mathFont m:val="Cambria Math"/> <m:brkBin m:val="before"/> <m:brkBinSub m:val="--"/> <m:smallFrac m:val="off"/> <m:dispDef/> <m:lMargin m:val="0"/> <m:rMargin m:val="0"/> <m:defJc m:val="centerGroup"/> <m:wrapIndent m:val="1440"/> <m:intLim m:val="subSup"/> <m:naryLim m:val="undOvr"/> </m:mathPr></w:WordDocument> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:LatentStyles DefLockedState="false" DefUnhideWhenUsed="true"
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</style> <![endif]--> </div><div align="right" class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: inherit; text-align: right;">“I have learned in whatsoever state I am therewith to be content.”</div><div align="right" class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: inherit; text-align: right;"><br />
</div><div align="right" class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: inherit; text-align: right;"> </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: inherit;"><span>Contentment is not the passive lack of motivation and desire.<span> </span>Contentment is not complacency.<span> </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: inherit;"><span>Contentment strives for improvement, but it does so by clinging to the only true source of improvement and clinging when all else would seem to entice it away.<span> </span>Contentment hopes, but it hopes confidently, resting in the promises that cannot fail.<span> </span>Contentment desires, but it trusts those desires to God.<span> </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: inherit;"><span>The contented man isn’t blind.<span> </span>He knows full well that there are plenty of worthwhile things he doesn’t possess.<span> </span>He simply prizes contentment over these.<span> </span>He realizes that he may lack something, but at least he has contentment.<span> </span>The discontented man possesses neither thing.<span> </span>Contentment is knowing there is something you do not have and trusting God to get it for you or to make you complete without it.<span> </span>Contentment is hoping for heaven while rejoicing in the heaven God creates today in your heart.<span> </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: inherit;"><span>Contentment does not ask, “What do I need to make me happy.”<span> </span>It has that already.<span> </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: inherit;"><span>Contentment does not come from having all of your needs met; it comes from having all of your God.<span> </span>It is not the product of luxury, abundance, comfort, or ease; it is the product of the presence of God.<span> </span></span></div><div align="right" class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: inherit; text-align: right;">“For He Himself has said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee.”<span> </span></div><div align="right" class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: inherit; text-align: right;"><br />
</div><div align="right" class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: inherit; text-align: right;"><span> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: inherit;">Contentment will not be anchored to earth by fears however legitimate and logical they may be but will soar on eagle’s wings to heights that the all the frantic flapping chickens will never reach.<span> </span>Contentment isn’t for chickens. </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: inherit;">The beauty of contentment lies in its ability to transform time into treasure, poverty into plenty, loneliness into loving service, and pressure into peace.<span> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: inherit;">Contentment gets its smooth, calm, stillness from the dam that keeps the little blessings of today from rushing downstream.<span> </span>It gets its sparkling clearness from its ability to let the little trials of today sink to the bottom or wash away.<span> </span>The muddy trials of tomorrow are allowed to stay upstream.<span> </span></div><div align="right" class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: inherit; text-align: right;">“Godliness with contentment is great gain.”<span> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08364772406101391283noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-417447597599890025.post-41349857142877820202011-01-10T19:20:00.000-06:002011-01-10T19:20:15.313-06:00First Day of School<i>More from my journal. </i><br />
<br />
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<div class="MsoNormal">1-10-11</div><div class="MsoNormal">On Friday, Mrs. Moses informed me that I will be teaching the fifth and sixth grade by myself from now on and that she will be taking grades seven and eight.<span> </span>This meant splitting up the class since she had been teaching all four grades in one room until now.<span> </span>I was excited about the chance to have a fresh start and my very own classroom and students.<span> </span>(I’m a little independent.) I was also nervous.<span> </span>Not only was this to be my first full time teaching experience, my full time grade school experience (I have these kids from 7:30- 2:30!) , and my first time being responsible for the full curriculum, but I was also nervous about the student’s reactions to the change.<span> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">I wanted to make a change.<span> </span>I didn’t want them to insist that I run the class the way Mrs. Moses did.<span> </span>I wanted to be in charge.<span> </span>So, I cleaned the classroom from top to bottom and redecorated.<span> </span>I put up new pictures, put fresh paper on the bulletin board, and rearranged the books.<span> </span>I changed the schedule, adding personal worship time, and two full hours of reading. (Reading workshop from Literacy methods class.)<span> </span>I carefully planned my lessons for the first day, and prayed for the best.<span> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">This morning I awoke to six inches of beautiful white snow.<span> </span>The whole morning said “Fresh Start.”<span> </span>My students arrived and were shown to their desks to begin personal worship time following the instructions on the board.<span> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">The day progressed with minimal challenges.<span> </span>The students are testing me to see if I really mean what I say.<span> </span>Do I. . . I am still having trouble with group discussions getting out of control.<span> </span>I will add talking chips tomorrow and see if that helps.<span> </span>I think I am firm, but exactly how to you get students to take turns talking?<span> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal">The girls were a little upset about the change.<span> </span>At one point both of them were begging to be promoted to seventh grade so they could be back with Mrs. Moses and Brittany.<span> </span>It didn’t hurt my feelings. . . I don’t like change either.<span> </span>We got through the morning.<span> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Case Study student (hereafter referred to as CSS) is struggling in math.<span> </span>I discovered today that she can do long division accurately in her head but can’t do the steps of a long division problem.<span> </span>How in the world and what do I do?<span> </span>She is reticent to do it the hard way since she is getting the right answers.<span> </span>She will need to be able to use the algorithm when the problems get harder.<span> </span>I guess I’ll keep teaching and insisting.<span> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Reading workshop was a huge success.<span> </span>The students like being read to. . . No surprise there, and they liked the true stories and informational books I insisted they choose.<span> </span>They liked those too.<span> </span>Esther really likes <i>Fiddlesticks and Freckles.<span> </span></i>(I thought I could count on Sam Campbell).<span> </span>After thirty minutes of personal reading I directed them to go to the art center (another hugely popular success) and create reading journals.<span> </span>During the first couple minutes the students were enthusiastic about sharing with their classmates the stories they had read.<span> </span>Creating a community of readers. . . Yeah!</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">By the end of the day I had the class won over.<span> </span>That wasn’t my primary goal, but they learned, they experiences success, they worked hard, they felt good about, and they enjoyed the whole experience.<span> </span>They left the class enthusiastic about the new program.<span> </span>One of the girls even said she likes it better this way.<span> </span>I overheard another say, “We had fun with Miss Johns today.”<span> </span>I hope that good attitude spreads to Gaby tomorrow.<span> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">I finally got them all to leave at 2:45 and went to work cleaning out the closet, shooing birds out of the school and lesson planning.<span> </span>Teachers definitely don’t work just eight hours a day.<span> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08364772406101391283noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-417447597599890025.post-85375391608346209602011-01-06T19:25:00.000-06:002011-01-10T18:48:32.219-06:00Student Teaching. . . the first week<i>One of the many things I have to do as a student teacher is to keep a daily journal of my experiences. I thought that my family and friends might be interested in hearing about it. I will try to only post the things that are of interest and skip the mundane and the educational jargon. Here are the last few entries. </i><br />
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<div class="MsoNormal">Daily Journal of Student Teaching</div><div class="MsoNormal">1-4-11</div><div class="MsoNormal"> I was late again this morning. I really will need to work on that. Still I managed to follow what I hope will become an unbreakable habit of praying on the steps on the school building before entering the door. I am here as a student, I am here as a teacher- a student of God and a teacher of His ways and I want Him to teach my and to teach through me. </div><div class="MsoNormal"> Since most of yesterday was devoted to recovering from the crazy hours I kept at GYC and the long drive here from Baltimore, this was my first real day of class. Miss Johns had the privilege to observe Mrs. Moses as she taught Esther, Josiah, Ria, Gaby, Darius, and Brittany. I am already starting to like these people. Mrs. Moses is so sweet and encouraging. I don’t think I will be nervous teaching in front of her. I am still a little shy around the students but a good game of hide and seek helped that. I think they are warming up to me. I want to show them Jesus. I hope that they will like me, but I am more interested in teaching them. </div><div class="MsoNormal"></div><div class="MsoNormal"></div><div class="MsoNormal"> I can’t wait to start teaching these sweet kids myself, but I am also glad for the chance to get on my feet and learn from the professionals. I start teaching two subjects next week, I am trying to decide which ones. </div><div class="MsoNormal"> I am finally a teacher, after all these years. I pray I will do my best. </div><br />
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</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08364772406101391283noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-417447597599890025.post-73955509225742358432011-01-06T17:20:00.000-06:002011-01-06T17:20:05.783-06:00My Name<div style="font-family: inherit;"><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:WordDocument> <w:View>Normal</w:View> <w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:TrackMoves/> <w:TrackFormatting/> <w:PunctuationKerning/> <w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/> <w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid> <w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent> <w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText> <w:DoNotPromoteQF/> <w:LidThemeOther>EN-US</w:LidThemeOther> <w:LidThemeAsian>X-NONE</w:LidThemeAsian> <w:LidThemeComplexScript>X-NONE</w:LidThemeComplexScript> <w:Compatibility> <w:BreakWrappedTables/> <w:SnapToGridInCell/> <w:WrapTextWithPunct/> <w:UseAsianBreakRules/> <w:DontGrowAutofit/> <w:SplitPgBreakAndParaMark/> <w:DontVertAlignCellWithSp/> <w:DontBreakConstrainedForcedTables/> <w:DontVertAlignInTxbx/> <w:Word11KerningPairs/> <w:CachedColBalance/> </w:Compatibility> <m:mathPr> <m:mathFont m:val="Cambria Math"/> <m:brkBin m:val="before"/> <m:brkBinSub m:val="--"/> <m:smallFrac m:val="off"/> <m:dispDef/> <m:lMargin m:val="0"/> <m:rMargin m:val="0"/> <m:defJc m:val="centerGroup"/> <m:wrapIndent m:val="1440"/> <m:intLim m:val="subSup"/> <m:naryLim m:val="undOvr"/> </m:mathPr></w:WordDocument> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:LatentStyles DefLockedState="false" DefUnhideWhenUsed="true"
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</style> <![endif]--> </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: inherit;"></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: inherit;"><span> <span style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">I think I am having an identity crisis. Not only am I a strange mix of student and teacher that leaves me giving more questions than answers (I thought teachers were supposed to know the answers) but my name is under serious attack. </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><span> </span>When I was born in the late eighties my parents loving named me Janalin Rae Johns.<span> </span>It sounded so simple and nice to them.<span> </span>However, it wasn’t long before my name started its life mission of embarrassing a large percentage of my casual acquaintances.<span> </span>My name absolutely loves to run away from the memories of people.<span> </span>As a coping mechanism these unfortunate individuals either avoided me or used a pseudonym.<span> </span>Common pseudonyms include Jana (reserved for family and close friends), Jan (not my favorite), Jenny, Jackie (I don’t get it either), Janni, Janilu, umm you, teacher, uh, etc.<span> </span>This is not to mention my numerous nicknames which I will not propagate by posting on the web.<span> </span>I am used to trouble with my first name.<span> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><span> </span>This time however, it is my last name.<span> </span>(Well my first name too, especially the spelling)<span> </span>My last name is one easy syllable.<span> </span>John only there are four of us so it’s Johns.<span> </span>What’s so hard about that?<span> </span>Then, to be proper and respectful, I call myself Miss Johns around my grade school students.<span> </span>That’s easy, Miss is for unmarried females like me, Johns is my last name, no stress right?<span> </span>Wrong.<span> </span>In the last twenty four hours I have been called Miss J. . . uhm,<span> </span>Miss new Teacher, Miss Jan. . . uh Johns, Miss John and probably other things which I have forgotten.<span> </span>I admit, the switch from Janalin to Miss Johns is hard for me too.<span> </span>Even with the Miss Janalin phase in between.<span> </span>I choked on it several times in the last two days.<span> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><span> </span>The one that really makes me laugh though is Mrs. Johns.<span> </span>Umm. . . that’s my mom.<span> </span>I have a theory.<span> </span>Somewhere in past the southern value system of respect for elders got into a fight with the southern drawl.<span> </span>This left sweet little southern kids calling someone else’s mama Miz Lee and their unmarried teachers Miz Dixie.<span> </span>This of course makes my dear mother who has been married for 27 years a Miz right along with the rest of us.<span> </span>That troubling “r” in” Mrs.” left the poor kids dreadfully perplexed and the whole region has never recovered.<span> </span>In an attempt to be sophisticated some attempted to put an “us” on the end (which is what the teacher said the “r” stood for) when addressing a woman, but have no idea whether it applies to single or to married women.<span> </span>I have been called Mrs. so many times since moving to the south.<span> </span>I just laugh and figure I might as well get used to it.<span> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><span> </span>So who am I?<span> </span>The kids and I are still trying to figure that out.<span> </span>Am I a Miss or a Mrs.?<span> </span>(that one at least I can answer <span>J</span>)<span> </span>Am I mean or nice?<span> </span>Will I let them get away with goofing off or will I stop them?<span> </span>Am I a good teacher or an average teacher?<span> </span>Am I friendly or shy?<span> </span>Perhaps both?<span> </span>Am I uncaring and “too busy” like so many adults in this world or do I care?<span> </span>Does my life measure up to the standard I claim or am I a hypocrite?<span> </span>Who am I?<span> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><span> </span>Jacob was called by his name “supplanter” as an indication of his character.<span> </span>After his night of wrestling with the angel and his conversion experience his received a new name “Israel” a prevailing prince of God.<span> </span>God had made him that and called him by a name.<span> </span>A new name for a new identity.<span> </span>I am reminded of Isaiah 43:1<span> </span>“Fear not for I have redeemed thee, I have called thee by thy name, thou art Mine.”<span> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><span> </span>God not only knows who I am but He knows who He makes me.<span> </span>He has promised me a new name.<span> </span>“Thou shalt no more be termed Forsaken; neither shall thy land any more be termed Desolate: but thou shalt be called Hephzibah, and thy land Beulah: for the LORD delighteth in thee, and thy land shall be married.<span> </span>For [as] a young man marrieth a virgin, [so] shall thy sons marry thee: and [as] the bridegroom rejoiceth over the bride, [so] shall thy God rejoice over thee.”<span> </span>Isaiah 62: 4, 5.<span> </span>I want to be known as the one who draws her identity from God.<span> </span>Not from my job, much as I love it, not from other people, not from my beliefs or ideologies, but from God.<span> </span>Who am I?<span> </span>I am the girl that Jesus left heaven for.<span> </span>I am the one who has been forgiven much and should love much.<span> </span>I am the one who wishes to stand on Mount Zion with the hundred and forty and four thousand, having His father’s name written in their foreheads.<span> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><span></span>I hope my students come to meet <i>Him</i>.<span> </span>Who I am really isn’t important as long as I am in <i>Him</i>.<span> </span>I hope they will come to know <i>Him</i> as never before.<span> </span>As their source of identity.<span> </span>Their all in all.<span> </span>Their life and love.<span> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">“And I will write upon him my new name.”<span> </span>Revelation 3:14</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08364772406101391283noreply@blogger.com0